Being a White Mom With an African American Daughter

April 13, 2012 |  by

My husband and I have three adopted kids. I’m a white woman. One of my daughters is African American. When we were going through the process of getting licensed to adopt, we were open to all races from the get-go. We live in a predominantly Caucasian area of our city, but feel we can make the effort to expose all our children to the beauty of diversity. Most days, I don’t think about race but sometimes (because of other people), I do.

Earlier this week, I was at the grocery store with my daughter. My little one is very cute and boisterous, so we get a lot of attention when are out and about. Sometimes it’s great, positive attention. Other times, it’s just odd stares.

I know that sometimes the onlooker is just trying to figure it out — especially if I’m with my husband and other kids. From the long stares and sometimes snarled faces, I can tell they are thinking that my daughter is from another relationship…or maybe trying to decide if I’m the babysitter. Sometimes, I want to say: “Hey, she’s adopted!” but of course, I don’t. I just hope that someday people think of adoption first (before adultery or babysitting) or better yet, just don’t think about it at all.